Mourning Songs

Missing Tick tock tick tock once again I hear the clock. I'm awake and in my chair. Tears are running in my hair. The bed's too big cause you're not there. Tick tock it's three o'clock. The silence in my ears is screaming and no longer am I dreaming. Will this nightmare ever end. My lover's gone and so's my friend. Missing.... Come and Go I scanned the cemetery and saw countless headstones knowing I was not alone and yet I could not shake that feeling. Why was I so solitary in my sorrow? My friend stood by me with such knowing. She had already walked this way, in another cemetery on another day. Committed to the dirt and to the clay, her lover she had left yet she must stay. She held my hand that day and helped me walk my way. Through the sorrow and must dos of death. The check list grew but I was unaware of it just go and do. The robot queen stepped in my place, doing dishes, smiling in my stead. Go and do and then one day the tears would not stay away. I couldn't put away this sorrow in a drawer or closet, it was here to stay for a week, a month or just a day? No one can tell me. Grief sits on my windowsill, like the dust that comes and goes and comes. I wipe it away and turn and see, "Oh you're back". I'm forced to say. Sorrow you're much too close a friend, I want this relationship to end. You don't need to come just go, but alas I have no control. So I grab your hand, suffering too. We have so much to go and do. Embracing these powered twins, I face each day and walk the walk. Tear streaked face, I must live and not die. Pushed on by some invisible grace, oh God you're here to see me through. Until my time to come to you. That's right it's all about coming home. My lover's gone, but there with you. So I hold onto my other friends, and siblings... We all must walk this way, in another cemetery on another day. Our suitcases we will not pack, on this journey there are no bags. With you there will be no needs, just go and be with you. You're the reason I go on. So many do not know, that Love takes us from this place. Some too young, others older still we leave. Darkness on the faces here, tear streaked hearts, not your doing God. You say, "Light be", and hope finds a place in chaos. You mold the universe with your dream and word. You kill a lamb who becomes a lion and we join your dream...and so I go and do to bring the goats and sheep to you.